Sunday, November 12, 2006

Calvin and geradine issue

sigh...yesterday met up with calvin...but din go for lunch together...soo in the end only passed him my tuition fee...cos it was raining heavily...and he was all wet!! like as if he dropped inside the pool like that... soo poor thing lo...walking and riding under a heavy rain -.-'' somemore weather soo cold sia... i was shocked when i saw him walking under the rain man...

Then he over there complaining very cold...wanna hug him tight...cos he say he cold ma...but i didnt hug him...cos "something" is stopping mie from doing it...is not i scared i will get wet...is not i'm afraid i will catch a cold..and not as if we din hug before?? but it's just "something" tat is stopping mie from doing it..."something" tat is telling mie i can't do that to him...i duno what is that "something"...but i seriously hate it...

*I dun anyhow hug guy...i dun anyhow let guy hug mie...even if i really hug a guy or allowing a guy to hug mie...i will think before i act it...i will think about the impact, is it wrong or right to do it, what kind of image will i create for myself etc...All this questions usually took mie for weeks before deciding to hug someone special to mie or allowing someone special to mie to hug mie...*

Then i saw his face was all wet...rain water is dripping from his hair to his face and to his body...took out a packet of tissue paper...wanna help him wipe away the rainwater on his face...but i didn't...is not i dare not do it or what..is "something" tat is stopping mie again..So i just pass him the whole packet of tissue and asked him to dry his face...

When he said he couldn't have lunch with mie..i understand..even if he say let's go have lunch...i will also reject..cos i seriously dun wan him to fall sick just to have lunch with mie...i wan him to hurry get home...bath and drink warm water...den eat something for lunch...i'm not disappointed though i waited for him from 12.30 to 2pm just to have lunch with him...yep i din eat anything for breakfast..just a cup of milo...nah it's not his fault for keeping mie waiting...it's the sudden rain which held him up in queensway...he asked mie to eat something first..but i refused..instead i fake him tat: "it's okay..i will wait for euu to have lunch together...i'm still not hungry" But well..i was actually hungry =x

Then when he about to go off..i wanna ask him to wait for mie...cos i wanna go to my house and take an umbrella den shelter him to the carpark...but then i didn't...instead i asked him to take care...be careful...the road is slippery...And yay...i was watching him running under the rain to the carpark...den i walked off slowly. While walking i was thinking of something again...thinking about him and thinking about that "something " that is stopping mie...at the same time worrying for him...

hheee!! tomorrow i'm meeting bryan...my son in law..hahah!! meeting him in tiong bahru..cos he wanan go there eat lunch ma..den no one to accompany him..soo i going with him since it's just for a while..after he eat liao den we go off le...another reason for goin is to take things from him..cos he wanna show mie something ma...and tat something will be super huge..if i'm going to collect from him in 24november den go for dinner..i must be crazy man...soo huge lor.. duno why i'm not scared of meeting him...-.-'' weird..??

To: Geradine
Darling!! i read ur blog le...thanks..thanks for telling mie ur problem...as in thanks for sending mie an sms at 3 plus just to tell mie euu very sad etc...but then i'm sorry i'm super sorry...i read it immediately when euu sent mie...but then i din reply euu or call euu...cos i was super tired...my eyes was half close when i read ur sms...i read it for three time before i get what euu mean...sorrie...i'm super sorrie for not being there for euu since i said i will be there for you no matter how late it is...haish..i feel soo bad sia...I noe euu won't blame mie..cos ur sms mentioned tat..."dun call mie...sms will do..cos i dun wan to disturb ur sleep". After i read ur sms liao den i fall asleep immediately...without closing back my flip phone...-.-'' Tat's why the first thing i do when i wake up is to sms euu see euu alrite a not...

Hmm...there is nothing much for mie to say regarding ur nitemare...what i wanna say i already sms euu about it le...just dun think too much lor..like mie..heheh!! i never think about those dream le..though it may seem real..but i won't let it affect mie and my thinking..i won't allowed it to happened no matter what happened...in conclusion..if euu keep thinking abt tat nitemare..there will be a high possibility tat it will happen...i dunno how to explain leh..it's like euu keep thinking it den etc...tat's what many adult said...soo dun think too much yea?? i understand how euu feel..it's like mie..hahah!! remember the dream that i told euu before?? yep..soo just cheer up and forget about the dream...and forcus on ur literature paper tomorrow yea?? dun let the dream haunt euu...=)

Aniwae...according to ur dream...u say euu couldn't find my hp number when euu wanna tell mie abt what happened to euu and jeff rite?? aiYoO...silly gurl..dun worry soo much..euu see what number den call wad number nor...no need die die must call my hp number one...i noe euu dun wanna disturb my family member...but it's alrite..cos u are seeking help not for a casual chat...soo in future no matter what happened...euu lost my hp number or wad...just call my house number k..?? if euu lost both my hp and house number...den euu get urself changed and come to my house...=D Only a few blocks away ma...

And i read ur past entries [yesterday] about what the master said...hmm...he said now euu will face alot of challenges in life..Just wanna let euu noe tat ...not to worry and not to afraid of all these challenges yea?? it's hard to go through all this hardship etc...just to let euu noe tat ..no matter what happened..i will pei euu till the end yea?? i won't let euu face all this alone...trust mie..=)

i end this at 1:14 AM with 0 comments

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Calvin and geradine issue

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